For the most part fathers are non-existent in the homes of the black community. These fathers are also missing from little league football practices all around the country. While watching my nephews develop their football skills and learn new football plays, I noticed that there was barely any practice going on. As I was walking, I passed by a few of the kids running around the playground and I saw a mother from last year’s team. I greeted her and we had a small chat about how things had been, what we’d been up to, and when we thought our team was actually going to win a game.

Grass freshly cut and the wind blowing upon a new season of football. Walking through the park gates unto the practice field I noticed the strangest thing. Last season, I barely paid attention to what was going on other than the clashing of helmets, the throwing of passes and coaches getting frustrated with the kids. This season I noticed one particular thing. It appeared as if every single parent that was at the practice was a single mother. If it wasn’t for the coaches then there would have only been a few men there. So the question that remains is where are the fathers? Where are the male role models in the homes? A deeper question to ask is what effect does this have on our young men?
Believe it or not, many of the mothers were pretty knowledgeable about the game of American football. It dawned on me that this could be a great story to write about. I also realized that the truth is a painful one, but wanted to find out more from the single parents. Were these women just crazy football fans? Were they there to get their adrenaline rush through their little men?

Woman Of The House

Marcia Irvin was one of the football mothers that I had the pleasures of interviewing on Saturday, September 8, 2013. She has seven beautiful kids with four of the boys playing football for the Lauderhill Broncos and Fort Lauderdale Hurricanes (South Florida.) Ms. Irvin has a total of five boys and two girls. The oldest of the bunch is eighteen years old and barely sees his father but once a year. Quite frankly, he doesn’t care to because he has grownup into adult hood without the presence of his father.

Children need to have their fathers home protecting, providing and teaching leadership to them. Instructing boys on how to be a man while incarcerated isn’t going to do the job. There is only so much a strong woman can do to teach their son life’s lessons. When I was growing up my mother was my biggest fan and my role model. She came to almost every game that my brother, Robince and I had. I was making touchdowns, sacks and big plays. My mother who could barely speak English would just clap her hands when she saw the other mothers on the team cheer. Deep down inside I was hoping that my father was there on the sideline, affirming me as his son.

I’ve mentioned the problem so now, what’s the solution? Every boy should have a male role model in their life. There is a huge shortage of fathers and mentors in our communities. This fact is very apparent at the graduations, sporting events and court rooms across the county.

Mentoring Programs and Father Figures

There are a several programs that are making a difference and trying to change the situation. For example, in Fort Lauderdale my church, Redeeming Word Christian Center International (www.rwcci.org) has a male and female mentoring program. Qualified men, such as myself, are prescreened prior to mentoring the youth at our church. Sister Tangela runs the program.

Another great program, Knights of Pythagoras Mentoring Networking has a youth mentoring program in Delray Beach, Fl. The students range from ten to nineteen years old. This has to be one of the best programs in the county. The idea is to the kids go to court rooms to watch the judicial system in action, they interview celebrities such as Jeff Johnson of Jeff Nation, and even go events to act as news reporters. C. Ron Allen is the founder of Kopm.org. “It will be a no-brainer to think that most kids living within two miles of the beach would have been to the beach at least a few times,” said C. Ron Allen, CEO of Kopmn.org.

The Urban League of Broward County also has several outstanding mentoring programs organized by William T. Jackson. iRealtiy Social Responsibility& Character Building Program, iDream Behavior Modification & Gang Resistance Education Program, and iFuture Youth Leadership Program. These programs are designed to empower, educate and provide opportunities for young people to serve as leaders within their communities. www.ulbroward.org.

In conclusion, let’s step up men. Our children need us. Our young kings are not living up to their highest potential because we aren’t there supporting them. The entire list off not for profit organizations mentioned above could use more mentors and donations- Please support them. Any and all comments are welcomed. Be Blessed_!@!

Written by Kevin Dorival, mentor and author of, “The Courage To Believe.” Follow me: @Courage2Believe
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